Somehow, my gene pool is rampant with people who like to expound on their knowledge about random things. Maybe it's not just my gene pool; maybe every family is like this. It makes me crazy, so I know two things from that: 1) I am probably overly sensitive about people in general who are self-proclaimed fonts of knowledge; and 2) I probably do the same thing more than I'd like to think I do.
On the "overly sensitive" front, I posted something today on Twitter about people getting a clue on Facebook. I was being snarky, and I posted on Twitter specifically because the person to whom I was alluding on Fb doesn't follow me on Twitter. Just venting, right?
Then a colleague who is 97.3% annoying at all times came back on Twitter with a comment to the effect that "Fb sux" (paraphrase) followed by the 'enlightening' comment that he only uses Fb because some people don't know how to upload photos anywhere else. Niiiiice--we're all just morons, those of us who use Facebook. It's not even remotely possible that people upload photos to 16 other sites and don't tell him for any one of many reasons. Oh, wait. I do that: Fb, Snapfish, Flickr, etc. Is there a need for him to know this? Not really. He just assumes...a lot.
The silver lining is that I'm not anywhere near as annoyed with the original clueless Facebook thing; the rest of the thundercloud is that I want to snag a specific ponytail in a woodchipper and turn up the power level.
One of these days, I'm going to turn to him--either physically (in a meeting) or by email--and seriously ask him how he got to be so much smarter than anyone else on earth. The unfortunate thing is that He. Will. Answer. The. Question.
AAARGGHHHHHHH!!!!
[But really people: if you want to say something about someone's status on Facebook, would you PLEASE leave the comment on--or even NEAR!--the status to which you are responding; it's not that complicated!]
Showing posts with label Snark. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Snark. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 07, 2009
Sunday, July 05, 2009
!!!!!!
Happy Anniversary to us!
23 years??
We have now officially been married longer than we were single.
23 years??
We have now officially been married longer than we were single.
To celebrate, we're going to Katherine and Alan's for a family cookout. It'll be interesting to see if they realized that two couples attending today have anniversaries (the other one is Tuesday); maybe she ordered a cake.
More likely, pigs will fly.
I am SUCH a bitch...
Monday, May 25, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Waste
The boss asked me to be at a meeting with her this afternoon at a library about an hour from ours. Things got weird because of scheduling and then I got sick so I wan't sure what to expect when I got there.
First of all, we started over half an hour after she told me to be there, 10 minutes late according to the prescheduled starting time. At that point, I knew I was in trouble, since the handouts all pertained to something I've been using for about 5 years (maybe more). This is a component that all the directors should be using, but what was on display was a clear case of the Peter Principle among a couple of them (not mine). There's a new component that was recently added, but after 2 hours we still hadn't gotten to it.
I bailed at 3:50. Got back to Sparky's school to pick him up at 5. I will definitely submit my mileage for reimbursement, but it was a lot of time that would have been better spent sleeping.
First of all, we started over half an hour after she told me to be there, 10 minutes late according to the prescheduled starting time. At that point, I knew I was in trouble, since the handouts all pertained to something I've been using for about 5 years (maybe more). This is a component that all the directors should be using, but what was on display was a clear case of the Peter Principle among a couple of them (not mine). There's a new component that was recently added, but after 2 hours we still hadn't gotten to it.
I bailed at 3:50. Got back to Sparky's school to pick him up at 5. I will definitely submit my mileage for reimbursement, but it was a lot of time that would have been better spent sleeping.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Symptom of the problem
Beast is out of town this week. That's not a big deal for me. Not really.
Between dialysis and diabetes--among other medical issues--his dad has continuing testing and evaluating going on, and one of my charges yesterday was to deliver some stuff to the hospital lab for them to work on. As far as I was concerned, I was going to the facility where he lives, picking the stuff up from the floor nurse while he was at dialysis, taking it to the lab, and leaving. Beast thought he had everything set up.
The first hurdle went up at the front 'reception' desk of the hospital where the volunteers demanded the name of the patient and then couldn't find him in the computer. Well, he's not a patient, so duh. I went on to the outpatient area and they couldn't find any record of this test. Turns out, we were supposed to pre-register the drop off. WTF?
So, I called Beast, who called his dad for the insurance info needed to register him, Beast called the registration desk, and that situation was resolved.
I went back in the lab and the tech informed me that she couldn't complete the orders from the doctor unless FIL was there because she needed a blood draw and his height/weight.
Huh? We were told--by this lab, where Beast picked up the equipment--that all we had to do was return the equipment and results. Nothing was mentioned about brining in FIL, nothing about a blood draw, nothing about pre-registering.
Of course, I couldn't go get FIL just then because he was still hooked up to the dialysis stuff for another 45 minutes or so half an hour away . Plus we would need to cancel his ride back to his apartment. Also, I needed to pick Sparky up from school at the same time a half an hour the other direction and get him home long enough to change clothes and eat before his band concert last night.
I was pissed, needless to say. The lab tech I was working with was not the one Beast had talked to--though she came out to 'apologize' (consisting of "I'm not sure who put my business card in the bag, because I wouldn't have said that"--some apology!). The one I worked with called the nephrologist several times to clarify what was going on, but he didn't return calls for the hour I was there. I told them several times that I would be happy to go get FIL after dialysis and bring him in, but I was annoyed (ahem) that we hadn't been told about this, and it was completely balling up the rest of my schedule.
Finally, in a stroke of genius, Beast called me and said, "Wait a second: if they need a blood draw to compare the results with...it won't work for you to bring him this afternoon. He's had dialysis. His blood won't resemble ANYthing from yesterday because it's been CLEANED! Duh."
Now. Explain to me why we, laypersons who don't 'do' medicine for a living, figured this out when the lab staff, who do 'do' this for a living, did NOT.
Really? No...REALLY??
The upshot--we'll do it all over again this coming weekend, and bring FIL into the hospital for the blood draw before he goes to dialysis next Monday.
So, 90 minutes after I walked in the building for a 10-minute (AT MOST) errand, I finally left with nothing to show for it except high blood pressure and 30 minutes of burned up cell phone usage. Beast probably burned through another 20 minutes on top of that.
The kicker? When Beast was registering FIL over the phone, the registrar basically said, "I don't see anything on this order from the doctor for a blood draw." He didn't tell me that until last night, fearing I might go apeshit on the tech.
I hope to hell I never get taken to this hospital as a patient. Every time we've dealt with them (ER for Beast, admission for FIL a couple of years ago, etc.) they have fucked up something. I know that mistakes happen, but that kind of track record in medical services is not something that makes me real confident.
I'm gonna be glad to get to work today where the insanity is, at least, not life-threatening.
Between dialysis and diabetes--among other medical issues--his dad has continuing testing and evaluating going on, and one of my charges yesterday was to deliver some stuff to the hospital lab for them to work on. As far as I was concerned, I was going to the facility where he lives, picking the stuff up from the floor nurse while he was at dialysis, taking it to the lab, and leaving. Beast thought he had everything set up.
The first hurdle went up at the front 'reception' desk of the hospital where the volunteers demanded the name of the patient and then couldn't find him in the computer. Well, he's not a patient, so duh. I went on to the outpatient area and they couldn't find any record of this test. Turns out, we were supposed to pre-register the drop off. WTF?
So, I called Beast, who called his dad for the insurance info needed to register him, Beast called the registration desk, and that situation was resolved.
I went back in the lab and the tech informed me that she couldn't complete the orders from the doctor unless FIL was there because she needed a blood draw and his height/weight.
Huh? We were told--by this lab, where Beast picked up the equipment--that all we had to do was return the equipment and results. Nothing was mentioned about brining in FIL, nothing about a blood draw, nothing about pre-registering.
Of course, I couldn't go get FIL just then because he was still hooked up to the dialysis stuff for another 45 minutes or so half an hour away . Plus we would need to cancel his ride back to his apartment. Also, I needed to pick Sparky up from school at the same time a half an hour the other direction and get him home long enough to change clothes and eat before his band concert last night.
I was pissed, needless to say. The lab tech I was working with was not the one Beast had talked to--though she came out to 'apologize' (consisting of "I'm not sure who put my business card in the bag, because I wouldn't have said that"--some apology!). The one I worked with called the nephrologist several times to clarify what was going on, but he didn't return calls for the hour I was there. I told them several times that I would be happy to go get FIL after dialysis and bring him in, but I was annoyed (ahem) that we hadn't been told about this, and it was completely balling up the rest of my schedule.
Finally, in a stroke of genius, Beast called me and said, "Wait a second: if they need a blood draw to compare the results with...it won't work for you to bring him this afternoon. He's had dialysis. His blood won't resemble ANYthing from yesterday because it's been CLEANED! Duh."
Now. Explain to me why we, laypersons who don't 'do' medicine for a living, figured this out when the lab staff, who do 'do' this for a living, did NOT.
Really? No...REALLY??
The upshot--we'll do it all over again this coming weekend, and bring FIL into the hospital for the blood draw before he goes to dialysis next Monday.
So, 90 minutes after I walked in the building for a 10-minute (AT MOST) errand, I finally left with nothing to show for it except high blood pressure and 30 minutes of burned up cell phone usage. Beast probably burned through another 20 minutes on top of that.
The kicker? When Beast was registering FIL over the phone, the registrar basically said, "I don't see anything on this order from the doctor for a blood draw." He didn't tell me that until last night, fearing I might go apeshit on the tech.
I hope to hell I never get taken to this hospital as a patient. Every time we've dealt with them (ER for Beast, admission for FIL a couple of years ago, etc.) they have fucked up something. I know that mistakes happen, but that kind of track record in medical services is not something that makes me real confident.
I'm gonna be glad to get to work today where the insanity is, at least, not life-threatening.
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Tip
If you get a new computer that's running on, say, Vista and you decided to download your personal dictionary off your old (really old) computer, do NOT follow the directions when the computer asks you to find your Windows 97 boot disc and insert it in the drive. Because then my laptop that I somehow broke won't get fixed as The Fixer (anyone else read that book?) is busy fixing someone else's computer, and I'll be cranky.
Just sayin'.
Just sayin'.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Innately wrong
These book titles, both by David Michie:
But what do I know? Clearly not as much as some people, but they aren't Buddhists either.
Buddhism for Busy PeopleAt least, they seem that way to my somewhat ill-informed, outsider view of Buddhism. I realize that Buddhists can be as busy as anyone else, but..."busy" seems a very Western concept, somewhat alien to the culture from which Buddhism sprung.
Hurry Up and Meditate
But what do I know? Clearly not as much as some people, but they aren't Buddhists either.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
I think I missed the memo
Mood: OKWhere was it posted? Because it really does seem like "Let's Be As Dumb As Possible Week."
Hair: Keeping my neck VERY warm tonight
Eyes: Sore, but feeling better than they have in awhile
Listening to: Some random football game Beast turned on (the NFL network): Colts/Vikes. I dunno.
- Saturday and Sunday were crazy-busy at work, due to the computers being psycho.
- Then there was the email I posted yesterday.
- Sarah Palin--every day something new. I can't even bear to read about her. This does NOT make me anti-woman. It makes me pro-humanity (and moose)!
- People monkeying with their meds, because they are so much smarter than doctors--and then wondering why they are having medical problems.
- The same person who wrote yesterday's email sent ANOTHER stupid one to the wrong person...long story.
Trust me: it’s boring librarian stuff but it totally infuriated me.]
I can't wait till tomorrow. The stupidity just keeps growing.
Urban Word:
phuket thailand: a word [sic] used to express absolute astonishment!
Phuket Thailand, life is pissing me off this week!
Monday, September 15, 2008
This is...just...incredible
Just found this in an email from a coworker which she sent to several of us; she is a reference librarian:
I assume Hurricane Ike is named after the former president? Think what would have happened if it would have been named after the current one! While I tend to agree that the idea of naming anything after Bush is farcical and probably will end up as a disaster, she apparently doesn't realize that "Ike" is a first name (hello, Ike Turner?) nor that the storms are not named for individuals.
Do y'all see why there are days when I want to put my face through a wall?
Urban Word:
Do y'all see why there are days when I want to put my face through a wall?
Urban Word:
27/4: 27 seconds a day, 4 days a week, i.e. quite rare
Identifying the person who put this in an email will be easier if I note that her ideal work plan is 27/4. She even includes Sundays in that work-week!
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Things to say to ensure you won't be loved
While all of these are true-life examples, they are not all current or specific. Just a list of things I've put together over the past couple of weeks.
(P.S. If any of this seems to apply to my good friends in blogland, it was unintentional in the extreme. I'm not pointing fingers at you! I am, in some specific cases, talking to myself if anyone at all.)
That is all for tonight.
- In any context, without a large smile and a beer in both people's hands--and even then sometimes--saying, "You are a huge and sucking black hole of an idiot, dude!" will lower your friend value.
- Interrupting people is not cute unless you are 3. Neither is cutting in line.
- Telling someone that you are too busy to talk when they are sobbing is bad. Unless someone's hair is on fire nearby.
- Verbalizing that common thought "what is the POINT of this meeting???" in the midst of one will not endear you to people. Especially if the implication is that everyone else in the room is a moron, and you are the only sensible one there.
- Leaving a tip at a restaurant is required, even if you are a girl. Figuring out the tip isn't that fucking hard, either.
- Forgiving people is harder than it sounds sometimes. It can be hard not to keep score in life, sort of play the quid pro quo game; sometimes it's impossible not to notice slights, whether they are intentional or not.
- Discussing someone else's lower standards of housekeeping, cooking, career, financial planning, gardening, fashion sense, workplace tidiness, etc. etc. should ONLY occur when the OTHER PERSON has deprecated themselves first. If you start that conversation, expect retaliation of some kind.
- Omitting an apology when you've fucked something up, even if it's (in your opinion) no big deal, is wrong.
- Omitting a thank you (or a response of any kind) for a time-consuming and well-done favor, or even just a kind word or a hug, is going to come back and bite your karmic ass hard.
- No one cares as much about what you are saying as you do. No one cares as much about your dreams as you do. People bore easily, even your best-est friends. It's not pretty, but it's true.
- Insinuating yourself into a serious conversation and then redirecting it toward some ridiculous story you've told 3 dozen times in the past half hour...is now punishable by hanging from the gallows newly constructed in the Children's Room.
- Speaking at a meeting (a round-table, everyone-is-equal meeting, not a seminar) for more than 5 minutes straight will not engender fellowship and goodwill, nor will your case be made. Unless, of course, your case is demoralizing and frustrating people.
- Being the one who is right all the time is not attractive in any way, shape, or form. Neither is being the one who is wrong; it's pathetic and besides, no one loves a martyr.
- There is a reason young people don't rule the world. It's not a hidden reason. It's well-known. It's called "experience." By definition, (most) young people ain't got as much. Facts of life, baby.
- There is a reason (many) old people are ignored. It's not a hidden reason. It's well-known. It's called "selective hearing/vision/awareness." And sometimes "hypocrisy." Facts of life, baby.
- Whining loudly about the severe water damage to your $500,000 ugly-ass house built last year on a flood plain will not make me feel sorry for you.
- Not many people look good in orange. I'm not sure why. That must be why it was chosen for prison garb. Hmmm...
- Stealing from your workplace and blaming the missing money on your subordinates will cause them to call you names (like Bitch from Outer Space, Psychopathic Silicon Life Form, Budget Nazi) for the rest of their lives, even if you never get 'caught.'
- Pandering will not buy my vote. I'm more pissed about the possibility of the first woman POTUS being a Republican than I can comprehend, or than McCain's 'deciders' might reasonably have expected.
- Complaining about your massive debt-load to someone with three times the debt mere months after celebrating a large financial windfall ... just unforgettable bad taste.
- Hubris is real. I fully expect three or more of the items to pop to the forefront of my life now to remind me that I live in a glass house.
(P.S. If any of this seems to apply to my good friends in blogland, it was unintentional in the extreme. I'm not pointing fingers at you! I am, in some specific cases, talking to myself if anyone at all.)
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Petty Is as Petty Does (Notes to Self)
Mood: SleepyAnnoyance: People who assume that working in a library means the employees have to behave like Glinda the Good Witch all the time, or who want my job so they can "read all day."
Hair: It's clean but the braid is ... in disarray
Eyes: Itchy
Listening to: NASCAR
Annoyance management: Seethe. Smile and roll eyes internally. Discreetly point out the lunatic across the room talking to him/herself. Ask if they'd rather clean the cart full of {filth of questionable origin}-encrusted picture books, or plunge the nearly-overflowing toilet in the children's room. Bite tongue. Remember not to say stupid things about other people's jobs in the future.
Annoyance: Allergy meds that cause unpleasant secondary symptoms.
Annoyance management: Stay away from allergens as much as possible. Take alternating cycles of acetaminophen and ibuprofen. Switch meds entirely. Move to a polar region.
Annoyance: Finding out that someone you admire can be unbearably holier-than-thou not to mention a bit passive-aggressive and thin-skinned about her own misbehavior.
Annoyance management: Point out unfairness of their behavior. Remove them from pedestal on which you placed them. Forgive them. Bite tongue. Remember not to behave that way in future.
Annoyance: Being the only person to show up at a celebratory event to which everyone at work was invited.
Annoyance management: Appreciate and fully enjoy the event. Be extra glad I showed up. Keep mouth shut at work unless someone else there mentions it.
Annoyance: Teenaged offspring and his behavior.
Annoyance management: Remember that the cooler we play it now, the better the relationship will be in the future. Enforce the rules, but be willing to renegotiate some of them. Bite tongue often.
Annoyance: Sudden lack of internet access at home.
Annoyance management: Do all the tricks we already know that usually fix the problem. Call provider. Do the new tricks they suggest. Try one more possibility after getting off the phone with them. Congratulate the brilliant person who thought of the last possibility that fixes the problem. Call provider and crow.
Note how many of these involve saying nothing and biting tongue. Do that more.
Urban Word:
Q.E.D.: A mathematician's way of saying "I win"
In social interaction, creating a Q.E.D. situation tends to mean it has not been a successful interaction.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Ranty
OK, I've just read yet another cranky librarian posting about last month's meeting in Anaheim.* I'm so tired of this. One thing that pisses me off more about it is that there is clearly NO financial UNDERSTANDING for why we (librarians) hold meetings in warm venues in summer and in cold weather venues in winter.
Here's a hint: CO$T! It's ALL about money. My guess--and it is a guess--is that it runs several thousands of dollars less to book Anaheim (or Miami) in summer and Chicago (or Minneapolis) in winter. The hotels are also cheaper, and they are more willing to do deals on prices just to fill the rooms and get something. So are tourist things, if that's your thing, and restaurants and airlines. This means--listen up--it costs less for us to attend than it would if we went someplace Neato and Coolio like St. Louis in January or Boston in June.
And why Anaheim instead of L.A.? Hello? Go read paragraph #2. It's cheaper.
Why do I know this? Because I know people who work in the for-profit world. As much as that annoys me sometimes--huh--they have to justify the money they spend, and I will tell you all that there are times when they look at government (i.e. that would be us, kiddies) and are appalled at how clueless and retarded we are. So, chalk one up to ALA for saving money. ALA gets kudos for being financially responsibile on this count at least from me.
I was in Anaheim last month, across the street from Disney. I hate Disney. I'm not ridiculous about it--for instance, I don't hate it the way I hate terrorists or liver-and-onions--because I didn't feel compelled to partake in ANYthing Disney while I was there. I didn't eat, shop, ride, or enjoy ANYthing related to Disney, except 5 minutes of fireworks one night, in spite of practically marinating in Disneyfied air.
Guess what: I don't go to conferences to a) drink, b) eat gourmet food, c) have spa treatment, d) tour the vicinity, e) bitch about my host (i.e that would be Anaheim, kiddies). I go to LEARN. I go to enjoy some networking, to get excited about my job, to find out what might be coming down the pike, to meet some interesting people that I otherwise would not (and I assure you, I am NOT talking about the people doing most of the talking, though I did speak to Tim Spalding in the LibraryThing booth and congratulate him for being an instigator), to see an old place in new light or a new place period, and to get the FUCK away from work for a change of scenery!
So, Anaheim was hot, and there was a lot of concrete. So, I am out of shape. So, I am not thin. So, somehow--though I'm beginning to wonder if I imagined it--I hiked the distance to and from my cheap-ass motel (bar- and restaurant-free, mind you) and the conference site. I rode the shuttle bus precisely once, just to see how that worked. I walked 6-plus hours one day on concrete in exhibit halls and never once tried to steal anything that I "thought" was free but wasn't. I probably put three times more mileage on my feet in California than I do in the average month in 'real life.' And you know what? I could have gone several more days doing the same thing! It fucking was not that bad. Frankly, I felt crappier when I was on vacation in London four years ago walking (duh!) concrete streets and marble museum floors for a week.
The people who are bitching on their blogs about how AWFUL it was in Disn...er, Anaheim have a tone to their commentary that is very curious to me. It is the sound of cheerleaders talking down the Ugly Chick. It is the sound of Heather dismissing Martha Dumptruck. It is NOT the sound of a group of people I hope represent libraries or librarians now, nor do I hope these are the future leaders of the profession. I hope that librarians aren't a bunch of spoiled, whiny, and unbearably rude brats. I hope this because, while I was never Martha Dumptruck or the Ugly Chick in high school, one of the reasons I love the movie "Heathers" is because I enjoy watching a 100% pure bitch drink drain cleaner. It's very...cleansing.
Can we just get over ourselves and our liberal, white-bread, white-ass snobbery and gain some understanding of what the FUCK we were supposed to be there for?! And if you whiners can't figure out the last bit, at least stop griping about the carbon footprint of the conferences, the fact that California is notoriously based on driving instead of walking, the inanity of Disney, the perception that ALA is run by "Boomer Deadwood" and therefore toe-dally SUX!, and the lack of crunchy Trader-Joe-approved food. Use that energy to make your workplace better in a positive way.
I dunno. Maybe y'all just need to get laid. Or get stuffed. But please, for the love of Mike, shut up! It's enough to make this liberal-but-not-crunchy post-Boomer want to throw up a little on your self-righteousness. I remember being young and perfectly sure of the stupidity, hypocrisy, inanity, whatever-ity of The Oldies. Some of them annoy me still, now. But, what do you remember? Watching Ursula beat up on Ariel? Yeah. OK.
And what are you doing about it? Oh. Yeah. Working on that Second Life avatar that will change the world while simultaneously making a new LOLcat. Great. Let me know how all that works out for you. I'm sure you'll blog about it. Just remember: the people in Anaheim that you are talking trash about are PEOPLE who can READ your BLOG and be OFFENDED about how UNPLEASANT some LIBRARIANS are being about the place they LIVE. How would you feel if they were talking your hometown down that way?
And yes, believe it or not, I do get the irony. Because, you know what? Irony has been around...awhile.
Word Spy Word:
* No, I'm not about to link to any of them. If you haven't read any of them, and care to, go Google 'em all up.
Here's a hint: CO$T! It's ALL about money. My guess--and it is a guess--is that it runs several thousands of dollars less to book Anaheim (or Miami) in summer and Chicago (or Minneapolis) in winter. The hotels are also cheaper, and they are more willing to do deals on prices just to fill the rooms and get something. So are tourist things, if that's your thing, and restaurants and airlines. This means--listen up--it costs less for us to attend than it would if we went someplace Neato and Coolio like St. Louis in January or Boston in June.
And why Anaheim instead of L.A.? Hello? Go read paragraph #2. It's cheaper.
Why do I know this? Because I know people who work in the for-profit world. As much as that annoys me sometimes--huh--they have to justify the money they spend, and I will tell you all that there are times when they look at government (i.e. that would be us, kiddies) and are appalled at how clueless and retarded we are. So, chalk one up to ALA for saving money. ALA gets kudos for being financially responsibile on this count at least from me.
I was in Anaheim last month, across the street from Disney. I hate Disney. I'm not ridiculous about it--for instance, I don't hate it the way I hate terrorists or liver-and-onions--because I didn't feel compelled to partake in ANYthing Disney while I was there. I didn't eat, shop, ride, or enjoy ANYthing related to Disney, except 5 minutes of fireworks one night, in spite of practically marinating in Disneyfied air.
Guess what: I don't go to conferences to a) drink, b) eat gourmet food, c) have spa treatment, d) tour the vicinity, e) bitch about my host (i.e that would be Anaheim, kiddies). I go to LEARN. I go to enjoy some networking, to get excited about my job, to find out what might be coming down the pike, to meet some interesting people that I otherwise would not (and I assure you, I am NOT talking about the people doing most of the talking, though I did speak to Tim Spalding in the LibraryThing booth and congratulate him for being an instigator), to see an old place in new light or a new place period, and to get the FUCK away from work for a change of scenery!
So, Anaheim was hot, and there was a lot of concrete. So, I am out of shape. So, I am not thin. So, somehow--though I'm beginning to wonder if I imagined it--I hiked the distance to and from my cheap-ass motel (bar- and restaurant-free, mind you) and the conference site. I rode the shuttle bus precisely once, just to see how that worked. I walked 6-plus hours one day on concrete in exhibit halls and never once tried to steal anything that I "thought" was free but wasn't. I probably put three times more mileage on my feet in California than I do in the average month in 'real life.' And you know what? I could have gone several more days doing the same thing! It fucking was not that bad. Frankly, I felt crappier when I was on vacation in London four years ago walking (duh!) concrete streets and marble museum floors for a week.
The people who are bitching on their blogs about how AWFUL it was in Disn...er, Anaheim have a tone to their commentary that is very curious to me. It is the sound of cheerleaders talking down the Ugly Chick. It is the sound of Heather dismissing Martha Dumptruck. It is NOT the sound of a group of people I hope represent libraries or librarians now, nor do I hope these are the future leaders of the profession. I hope that librarians aren't a bunch of spoiled, whiny, and unbearably rude brats. I hope this because, while I was never Martha Dumptruck or the Ugly Chick in high school, one of the reasons I love the movie "Heathers" is because I enjoy watching a 100% pure bitch drink drain cleaner. It's very...cleansing.
Can we just get over ourselves and our liberal, white-bread, white-ass snobbery and gain some understanding of what the FUCK we were supposed to be there for?! And if you whiners can't figure out the last bit, at least stop griping about the carbon footprint of the conferences, the fact that California is notoriously based on driving instead of walking, the inanity of Disney, the perception that ALA is run by "Boomer Deadwood" and therefore toe-dally SUX!, and the lack of crunchy Trader-Joe-approved food. Use that energy to make your workplace better in a positive way.
I dunno. Maybe y'all just need to get laid. Or get stuffed. But please, for the love of Mike, shut up! It's enough to make this liberal-but-not-crunchy post-Boomer want to throw up a little on your self-righteousness. I remember being young and perfectly sure of the stupidity, hypocrisy, inanity, whatever-ity of The Oldies. Some of them annoy me still, now. But, what do you remember? Watching Ursula beat up on Ariel? Yeah. OK.
And what are you doing about it? Oh. Yeah. Working on that Second Life avatar that will change the world while simultaneously making a new LOLcat. Great. Let me know how all that works out for you. I'm sure you'll blog about it. Just remember: the people in Anaheim that you are talking trash about are PEOPLE who can READ your BLOG and be OFFENDED about how UNPLEASANT some LIBRARIANS are being about the place they LIVE. How would you feel if they were talking your hometown down that way?
And yes, believe it or not, I do get the irony. Because, you know what? Irony has been around...awhile.
Word Spy Word:
kindergarchy: n. Rule or domination by children; the belief that children's needs and preferences take precedence over those of their parents or other adults.
Do I really need to explain why I chose the word kindergarchy to end this post? OK, here's the thing: I'm not against people younger than me. I just don't want the good-hearted ones I know to be overrun by the Asshats with Attitude, a.k.a. Kindergarchs.
* No, I'm not about to link to any of them. If you haven't read any of them, and care to, go Google 'em all up.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Why I Love the Public (pt. ...uh...4,000,000,000?)
The phone at the Reference Desk rang last night at 8:43, just as I was about to make the "we're closing, go home you manky dolts!" annoucement.
"Is there...do you know how...{pause} OK, are you busy? Can you just come up to the circ desk for a sec?" It's Thursday night just following a wing-dinger of a thunderstorm--of course it's not busy. I debate making the announcement and then decide that whatever's going on up front can be handled quickly and THEN I'll chuck people out.
So I arrived up front. As I round the corner to the circ desk, I realize with that I was far too optimistic. My current least-favorite Thursday night regular is standing there, Mr. I've-Been-Hacked-on-the-Library's-Computers. Dude has hit several of us up about people getting his password and logging onto his account and using his time!!! Oh the horror of that! He was so demanding about it the first time--several months ago--that we went ahead and created a new library card so he could start over fresh because he insisted that changing his password on the old card wouldn't stop people from continuing to hack in.
Mind you, all they seemed to be doing thus far was using his time. To clarify, everyone gets an hour a day, which is shown on the screen when you first log in. If you've already been in and checked your email once at 10 a.m. and come back at 3, the timer will say something like "34 minutes" indicating that you have used 26 minutes already.
So about two months ago, dude comes FLYING up to me while I'm helping someone at the Ref Desk: "Someone has hacked my account! They've used my time. I just got here and it's telling me I've already used up part of my hour! I haven't..." Since I was helping someone else at the time, I told him to go log off for now and I'll come figure it out when I've finished with the people ahead of him in line. He was huffy, but I got to him quickly. Of course, he is (always) using the computer farthest away from the Ref Desk--and the rest of humanity--so it's a hike. When he logs back on, he points to the timer and says, "SEE?? SEEE???????? It says I only have 27 minutes left! But I haven't been here ALL DAY!" I look at the time, check my watch, and say, "Well, it is a little confusing, yes, but the fact is that we close in about 27 minutes, so that's all the time you have left today...because the computer will automatically shut down then."
"BUT SOMEONE USED MY TIME!!!" I go through the mechanics of what I had just said several more times and he eventually settled down with some grumbling.
However. Last night. OMG.
He logged on. Someone had used his time again. (same reason, duh) Plus, when he got into the start screen, there were two email accounts open on the desktop. Now THIS is weird: when people log off, the hard drive is supposed to be wiped clean of every-damn-thing they've been doing. He wrote down the email addresses and then proceeded on to use the internet. And logged out.
And then came to the circ desk to get a new library card. Because SOMEONE HAS HACKED INTO HIS ACCOUNT! [Pay attention--you'll love this next part.] See, those two people who left their email accounts logged in? They were hacking him. From those email accounts. Yeah. Because, somehow they knew he would be the next person in, and they could sit at another computer somewhere and log into their email and...what? This is not a party line on a phone where everyone can talk to everyone through any receiver they've left off the hook (i.e. any computer they've logged into their email with). Is it?
For the love of Pete.
So I told him that a) no one had used his time, it was just counting down till closing; b) he needs to tell us immediately when he sees the computer doing something he thinks is bad--like having other people's email still open after he logs in!; c) what you are suggesting is technically highly improbable (hell, it could be possible--how do I know?).
Then I told him again.
And again. And again. I even, at one point, say, "Look, you have to come get us as soon as you see something weird. After all, you don't go to the doctor a week after you stop throwing up to find out what made you sick last week, right?"
Luckily, he had to "leave for work."
Once he left, I made the #)@$*% Closing Announcement. Then I talked to ILL Tyrant--who had called me for help--and she said she had basically gone through the whole thing with him and he wasn't listening. Then Sout’ Sider said the whole hot mess had started with him demanding a new library card because (all together now) his account had been hacked!!
Dude is terminally nutso. He doesn't seem to be capable of getting unstuck from this one subject. But yet, he will sit down at a potentially buggy computer and open his own email and type in who-knows-how-many other passwords? And he will continually use a computer that he thinks has messed him up innumerable times rather than using any one of the other 30 in the building?
So, I have a list of stuff from last night to go over with the boss this morning:
This is why she gets paid the big bucks.
Urban Word:
"Is there...do you know how...{pause} OK, are you busy? Can you just come up to the circ desk for a sec?" It's Thursday night just following a wing-dinger of a thunderstorm--of course it's not busy. I debate making the announcement and then decide that whatever's going on up front can be handled quickly and THEN I'll chuck people out.
So I arrived up front. As I round the corner to the circ desk, I realize with that I was far too optimistic. My current least-favorite Thursday night regular is standing there, Mr. I've-Been-Hacked-on-the-Library's-Computers. Dude has hit several of us up about people getting his password and logging onto his account and using his time!!! Oh the horror of that! He was so demanding about it the first time--several months ago--that we went ahead and created a new library card so he could start over fresh because he insisted that changing his password on the old card wouldn't stop people from continuing to hack in.
Mind you, all they seemed to be doing thus far was using his time. To clarify, everyone gets an hour a day, which is shown on the screen when you first log in. If you've already been in and checked your email once at 10 a.m. and come back at 3, the timer will say something like "34 minutes" indicating that you have used 26 minutes already.
So about two months ago, dude comes FLYING up to me while I'm helping someone at the Ref Desk: "Someone has hacked my account! They've used my time. I just got here and it's telling me I've already used up part of my hour! I haven't..." Since I was helping someone else at the time, I told him to go log off for now and I'll come figure it out when I've finished with the people ahead of him in line. He was huffy, but I got to him quickly. Of course, he is (always) using the computer farthest away from the Ref Desk--and the rest of humanity--so it's a hike. When he logs back on, he points to the timer and says, "SEE?? SEEE???????? It says I only have 27 minutes left! But I haven't been here ALL DAY!" I look at the time, check my watch, and say, "Well, it is a little confusing, yes, but the fact is that we close in about 27 minutes, so that's all the time you have left today...because the computer will automatically shut down then."
"BUT SOMEONE USED MY TIME!!!" I go through the mechanics of what I had just said several more times and he eventually settled down with some grumbling.
However. Last night. OMG.
He logged on. Someone had used his time again. (same reason, duh) Plus, when he got into the start screen, there were two email accounts open on the desktop. Now THIS is weird: when people log off, the hard drive is supposed to be wiped clean of every-damn-thing they've been doing. He wrote down the email addresses and then proceeded on to use the internet. And logged out.
And then came to the circ desk to get a new library card. Because SOMEONE HAS HACKED INTO HIS ACCOUNT! [Pay attention--you'll love this next part.] See, those two people who left their email accounts logged in? They were hacking him. From those email accounts. Yeah. Because, somehow they knew he would be the next person in, and they could sit at another computer somewhere and log into their email and...what? This is not a party line on a phone where everyone can talk to everyone through any receiver they've left off the hook (i.e. any computer they've logged into their email with). Is it?
For the love of Pete.
So I told him that a) no one had used his time, it was just counting down till closing; b) he needs to tell us immediately when he sees the computer doing something he thinks is bad--like having other people's email still open after he logs in!; c) what you are suggesting is technically highly improbable (hell, it could be possible--how do I know?).
Then I told him again.
And again. And again. I even, at one point, say, "Look, you have to come get us as soon as you see something weird. After all, you don't go to the doctor a week after you stop throwing up to find out what made you sick last week, right?"
Luckily, he had to "leave for work."
Once he left, I made the #)@$*% Closing Announcement. Then I talked to ILL Tyrant--who had called me for help--and she said she had basically gone through the whole thing with him and he wasn't listening. Then Sout’ Sider said the whole hot mess had started with him demanding a new library card because (all together now) his account had been hacked!!
Dude is terminally nutso. He doesn't seem to be capable of getting unstuck from this one subject. But yet, he will sit down at a potentially buggy computer and open his own email and type in who-knows-how-many other passwords? And he will continually use a computer that he thinks has messed him up innumerable times rather than using any one of the other 30 in the building?
So, I have a list of stuff from last night to go over with the boss this morning:
-- Mr. I've-Been-Hacked-on-the-Library's-ComputersHee.
-- the non-functional Line 3 that went out during the storm last night
-- the missing emergency light that used to be at the Ref Desk that is MIA now
-- the fact that the pages don't have time to shelve and there are probably close to 100 abandoned books lying all over the nonfiction area since last Thursday when I cleaned all the tables off PLUS the cartload of stuff that's been sitting since the beginning of June next to the Ref Desk
....
This is why she gets paid the big bucks.
Urban Word:
combat nap: That 5-10 minute nap that you have to take when your body is completely exhausted and your mind is over stressed. Happens if you want it or not, and you usually wake up feeling like you've had a full night's rest.
I really could've used a combat nap last night at about 8:45.
Thursday, July 03, 2008
FYI and stuff and more than
Mood: mmm...okay, I guessSo, this is directed at the librarians who may be reading. I just left a semi-snarky anonymous comment on the latest very snarky post by The Annoyed Librarian (that phrase, in pink, is of course as redundant as can be), which is about the ALA conference. Apparently, she was at a different venue from the one I attended. Entirely. 100%. Note that I'm not linking. She's not particularly hard to find, but I've discovered that Pure Snark gets to be Purely Tiresome quickly. On the other hand, my comment is not obviously snarky, so at least I haven't descended to her level. Hah. (oh, the irony) And see my previous post re pomposity.
Hair: clean, styled...takin' names
Eyes: meh
Listening to: The Blowers (it's freakin' COLD in here and I forgot my new shawl. Again.
Oh, well. Just sayin'. If you haven't got anything nice to say, shaddup. So I am. Goodbye.
Urban Word:
Shituation: n.: a bad situation, 2.: a dramatic, usually negative happening resulting in utter shit in one's life.Pffftttttt.....
Houston, we have yet another shituation in the family. But since I don't want to talk about it--yet--I'm taking out my frustration on other annoyances in my life.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Conference People
Mood: Good, but a bit jet-laggedSo, yeah. I was in Anaheim, across the street from Disneyland, for the last 4-plus days. (see below for best cynical description of the conference) I had a blast, learned some stuff, ate a lot of rubber chicken for lunch, and appreciated the California weather if not the smog. I now feel totally less stupid about what's coming up in the future of my job. We use far-too-freakin-many acronyms, by the way.
Hair: whatever
Eyes: ditto
Listening to: ads, and "Deadliest Catch" (Phil is coughing up blood and refusing medical care)
I also gelled my sense that lots of people in the profession are pompous asses. By the way, there's no age exclusion for that--there seem to be just as many asshat 30-year-olds as 55-year-olds. I'll match you name for name. You start. Go on.
People are fun to watch, though. My feet hurt. I shipped 10 lbs. of stuff from the exhibits, and could have done another 10 easily had I wanted to stand in line for another box. Instead, I just practiced better packing principles...and used two of the six free bags I picked up.
Glad to be home. Don't really want to go to work tomorrow...because I got the most retarded email EVER from Schedule Nazi while I was gone. She is 100% idiot. {{newsflash}} Not really: it's common knowledge.
Urban Word:
interesting: (adj) Something which arouses no interest at all.
Used to politely avoid admitting this, which indirectly expresses your indifference.
When attending a conference with 25,000 other librarians, sometimes the best thing to say is "Gee, that was interesting."
Friday, May 23, 2008
Oh, for REAL?!
This may be the nadir of the internet, and the reason bloggers sometimes get a lot of flak.
Also, kids skateboarding on the roof of our library?
And gang signs in our street? I just came in from talking to the cop who came and took photos, but I think the reason for the grafitti is more of a 'vote' for Ghostface Killah, than a gang sign. However: hot red/pink spray paint?
Really??
Also, kids skateboarding on the roof of our library?
And gang signs in our street? I just came in from talking to the cop who came and took photos, but I think the reason for the grafitti is more of a 'vote' for Ghostface Killah, than a gang sign. However: hot red/pink spray paint?
Really??
Friday, February 08, 2008
For clarity's sake
An extract, for your reading pleasure, from the Usborne website dedicated to "A Surprise for Princess Ellie" (that damnable PINK one pictured in my previous post). My comments are in block parens:
CHAPTER ONENext week, I'll take the first few pages of Eragon and deal with them, just to be fair.
"Good girl," [oh, goodie, the horse is female too] said Princess Ellie, as she cantered Moonbeam [eyeroll] towards the last jump. The palomino pony eyed the wooden poles warily and tried to swerve away. But Ellie was ready for her. She [the horse?] kept a firm hold on the reins [oh, "she" in this sentence is not "her" in the previous sentence...] and pushed the pony on with her legs. Moonbeam did as she was told. She leaped forward and cleared the jump easily. Ellie galloped between the finishing posts and pulled her pony to a halt. Then she turned round to see how the others were getting on. She was just in time to watch her best friend soar over the wooden poles on Rainbow [FUCK me!]. Kate's jumping had improved enormously since she came to live with her gran, the palace cook [cooks are good jumpers? hmmm]. Perhaps that was because of all the practice she had on Ellie's ponies [oh, well, better than riding her Gran around anyway]. Prince John was further back, riding Sundance [forehead smack]. The chestnut pony jumped over a fallen tree trunk and cantered down the hill towards the last obstacle. Then he pricked his ears forward, lifted his front legs [lifting the back legs would be wholly different] and bounded over it. Prince John grinned broadly. It was hard to tell which of them was enjoying themselves most, as they galloped through the finishing line. "That was brilliant," said John, as they rode slowly back towards the stables. "I'm going to ask my father to build a cross-country course in the grounds of our palace – but I'm sure mine will be longer." "Of course it will," sighed Ellie. She really liked John. He was the only royal person she knew who shared her love of ponies. But he did have an annoying habit of insisting everything was bigger and better at his home in Andirovia. Kate leaned forward and patted Rainbow's grey neck ["Rainbow" is...grey? OMG]. "I'm not surprised you want one," she said. "Cross-country's much more exciting than jumping in the paddock."
"But even that's not as exciting as a real adventure," [Horse-jumping as adventure? Uh, really?] said John. "Do you remember how we went hunting for ghosts last time I came to stay?" "I was really scared," [chicken!] said Ellie. "So was I," agreed Kate. [henceforth to be known as The Agreeable Friend] "But it was still fun," [translation: "scaring girls is fun, and they enjoy it anyway"] laughed John. "What are we going to look for this time?" The girls stared at him blankly [...as girls do most of the time, y'know]. "Well, aren't there any mysterious legends about your palace? What about tales of hidden treasure?"
"I've never heard any," said Ellie.
"Dragon's eggs?" asked John.
"Now you're being silly," giggled Kate. [The Agreeable, Giggly Friend]
"How about a secret passage, then?" suggested John. "All the best palaces have one of those. Our one at home is brilliant." [It has an IQ of 183!]
"But that's not secret," Ellie declared with delight. "It can't be if you know about it." [Well, she's not as dumb as all that] At that moment, they reached the lane that led to the palace stables. A bay pony whinnied loudly and cantered across the nearby field to meet them. She was larger than the ponies they were riding, and the long hair that nearly hid her hooves made her look like a miniature carthorse. She skidded to a halt beside the fence and put her head over the top rail.
"This is Starlight," [it seems obvious that all these horses were named by 4-year-olds] explained Ellie, as Moonbeam sniffed noses with the bay pony. "Do you like her?" [We've got the sun, moon, stars and rainbows covered...all's we need is rain and lightning...and something like midnight or night-time...]
"She's [no male ponies allowed!!] lovely," said John. It was the first time he had come to stay since Starlight arrived, so he hadn't met her before. "She looks much better than she did in that photo you e-mailed to me." Ellie smiled proudly. [uh...is she proud of her mad emailing skilz or the fact that she can't take a decent photo, or maybe because the horse hasn't died yet?] "I'd only just found her then. She'd been living wild for so long that she looked really neglected." [And I'm sure you are the Angel of Mercy who has been nursing her back to health every day] "She doesn't any more," said John. He twisted a finger thoughtfully in Sundance's chestnut mane and added, "She's quite fat now." [words every girl, including a girl horse, loves to hear]
"No, she's not," said Ellie, indignantly. “She's just well built. [big-boned] Ponies like her have big bones." [yup, I told ya] She turned Moonbeam firmly away from the fence and led the way towards the stables. "You don't have to be thin to be beautiful." [...but it helps, girls, it helps. Don't forget: boys notice this stuff!]
There was a long, awkward pause. Then Kate [The Agreeable, Giggly Peacemaker] broke the silence by saying, "Wasn't Ellie clever to catch Starlight?" [Oh, yeah, it's clearly a sign that she should join Mensa] She looked wistful for a moment and added, "I wish I could find a pony." "So do I," [uh, what's wrong with the one you are SITTING ON?!] said John. "I'd like a palomino, like Moonbeam." [OK, everyone in the bus--we're headed to the Lost Pony Store, where you can all pick your favorite color Lost Pony! Pending availability....]
"Copycat!" cried Ellie.
"No, I'm not," said John. "My palomino would be bigger than yours." [Boys are, after all, ONLY about size!]
"Then it wouldn't be like Moonbeam, would it," [see, different sizes mean different breeds...] Ellie declared. "Anyway, you don't need another pony. You've got two already." She'd seen plenty of pictures of the beautiful, chestnut mares he'd left behind in Andirovia. "Why shouldn't I have three?" argued John. "You already had Sundance, Moonbeam, Rainbow and Shadow [yup, had to know it was coming] when you got Starlight. That's five." He sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "Anyway, there's no point arguing about it. My father already thinks I spend too much time riding. [not manly enough] There's no way he'd buy me another pony." "My dad won't get me a pony at all," added Kate, very quietly. ["The last pony, Mom cut up and made into stew. It was delicious, but I missed riding the pony."] The sadness in her voice made Ellie feel guilty. It was mean of her to argue with John about how many ponies they had, when Kate didn't even have one. Ellie was happy to share her ponies with her best friend, but she knew that wasn't the same. Kate desperately wanted a pony of her own. If only there was something Ellie could do to help. [Something tells me there IS something she can do! Quick, go get the book and read Chapter Two]
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Good food, good company
Yesterday was almost a total loss as far as getting "work" done (at work). That's okay: I got some stuff done, nothing major, talked a lot about our software with colleagues at a meeting (and found some new-to-me cool stuff).
I was a little extra-flighty, though, because my brother called at 8 a.m. to remind me that he and his wife were in the City to the Northeast (BCN)--where I was on Friday--for a workshop/training session she needed to attend (regarding software, ironically). So, while I drove an hour to MY software meeting, Beast scrambled around the web looking for possible meetup sites for us, my nephew James who lives south of the BCN, and my niece Katherine who lives much closer toward the Giant City Directly to the East (GCDE). Del, my brother, called James and Katherine and left messages about meeting up.
When I got back to work about 1, I looked at the choices Beast had compiled, picked what looked like the easiest one to access from major highways (we have a GPS, so does Del, and James has lived in the area his whole life so would probably find us regardless...but Katherine is not familiar with the area at all). Set the time for 7. Called Del and gave him the address. He said he'd call James. Katherine called me around 2:30 to see what we'd discovered.
She is a HUGE pain in the ASS!! "I thought we were meeting where you live." (Yeah, cuz that's fair for everyone else!) "It's too far." (A little farther than we had to travel, and a much straighter shot.) "It's on the highway." (She hates driving the interstates in the GCDE.) "Let me call Alan and see if he wants to come." (...so he can drive instead.) "You've never eaten there?" (No, we don't usually drive an hour to eat dinner...no. But the website gives you a ton of info; it looks fun.)
Half an hour later, she called back: nope. Too far, and at rush hour. Which is why we picked 7, not 6, to make rush hour less of a deal for her. We could have done 7:30, I suggested. Nope. Still, too far.
Note: multiple decisions revolved completely around her. We could have figured out something MUCH more convenient for the rest of us.
She gives me a pain. She and I are supposed to get together Saturday. We haven't been able to do so for 6 weeks because of our schedules. However, when I call tomorrow, I'm going to tell her that whatever she wants to do, I'll do. SHE can figure it all out and just tell me to be somewhere at some time. Call me when she sorts it out. Then perhaps she'll know how it feels.
SO! Why is the post entitled the way it is? Because the five of us (Del's wife had a dinner thing for her training session) had a great time last night. The place was fun--it's an apple orchard/dinner theatre/family style place....there's a goat ramp outside (need I say more??)--the food was good, if very heavy on starch and carbs and fat, but we had fun. The waitress spent the majority of the meal totally picking on Del--"Why didn't you eat your carrots?" was one of her comments. Mind you, she was younger than anyone at the table. We talked about everything from business contracts to politics in Venezuela (I'm ignorant) to punching bosses (someone did that recently) to grandparents to the evils of Texas.
Incidentally, they stop seating people at 8. So, yeah, we couldn't have pushed the time too much more. And Katherine would have been appalled at the bathroom situation. Really fucking freaked out in every direction; it was pretty dire, even for me!
I love my family.
Most of it.
Today is going to be much more boring, and less fun all the way around.
I was a little extra-flighty, though, because my brother called at 8 a.m. to remind me that he and his wife were in the City to the Northeast (BCN)--where I was on Friday--for a workshop/training session she needed to attend (regarding software, ironically). So, while I drove an hour to MY software meeting, Beast scrambled around the web looking for possible meetup sites for us, my nephew James who lives south of the BCN, and my niece Katherine who lives much closer toward the Giant City Directly to the East (GCDE). Del, my brother, called James and Katherine and left messages about meeting up.
When I got back to work about 1, I looked at the choices Beast had compiled, picked what looked like the easiest one to access from major highways (we have a GPS, so does Del, and James has lived in the area his whole life so would probably find us regardless...but Katherine is not familiar with the area at all). Set the time for 7. Called Del and gave him the address. He said he'd call James. Katherine called me around 2:30 to see what we'd discovered.
She is a HUGE pain in the ASS!! "I thought we were meeting where you live." (Yeah, cuz that's fair for everyone else!) "It's too far." (A little farther than we had to travel, and a much straighter shot.) "It's on the highway." (She hates driving the interstates in the GCDE.) "Let me call Alan and see if he wants to come." (...so he can drive instead.) "You've never eaten there?" (No, we don't usually drive an hour to eat dinner...no. But the website gives you a ton of info; it looks fun.)
Half an hour later, she called back: nope. Too far, and at rush hour. Which is why we picked 7, not 6, to make rush hour less of a deal for her. We could have done 7:30, I suggested. Nope. Still, too far.
Note: multiple decisions revolved completely around her. We could have figured out something MUCH more convenient for the rest of us.
She gives me a pain. She and I are supposed to get together Saturday. We haven't been able to do so for 6 weeks because of our schedules. However, when I call tomorrow, I'm going to tell her that whatever she wants to do, I'll do. SHE can figure it all out and just tell me to be somewhere at some time. Call me when she sorts it out. Then perhaps she'll know how it feels.
SO! Why is the post entitled the way it is? Because the five of us (Del's wife had a dinner thing for her training session) had a great time last night. The place was fun--it's an apple orchard/dinner theatre/family style place....there's a goat ramp outside (need I say more??)--the food was good, if very heavy on starch and carbs and fat, but we had fun. The waitress spent the majority of the meal totally picking on Del--"Why didn't you eat your carrots?" was one of her comments. Mind you, she was younger than anyone at the table. We talked about everything from business contracts to politics in Venezuela (I'm ignorant) to punching bosses (someone did that recently) to grandparents to the evils of Texas.
Incidentally, they stop seating people at 8. So, yeah, we couldn't have pushed the time too much more. And Katherine would have been appalled at the bathroom situation. Really fucking freaked out in every direction; it was pretty dire, even for me!
I love my family.
Most of it.
Today is going to be much more boring, and less fun all the way around.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Family Time, a.k.a. Equilibrating
This is a post that has been begging to be written for a week. I'm not sure I'm really able to do it "right" even now. I may not have achieved enough distance. This is, however, the calmest version I've been able to come up with. I still have the original, unexpurgated version(s), in Drafts.
My family--in case you haven't figured this out--is scattered. I am one of the fortunate few who lives within 50 miles of several adult family members: two nephews and a niece (and a nephew-in-law). My mom and oldest sister and brother-in-law live less than 10 miles from one another. Otherwise, we are all far enough away from each other to make "seeing family" a fairly Big Deal and an unusual occurrence.
Lots of people in the area where we live grew up here, have lived here the majority of their lives, and have family very close by. In our church, there are several families with three generations of members. One has four generations. I think that is kind of cool to be able to say about our church, but quite frankly it makes interpersonal stuff in our church a bit of a minefield. If you have a disagreement with one person, it can easily blow up into entrenched warfare. For the most part, it doesn't (that I'm aware of) because people do their best to stay out of each other's fights.
That's the background. Here's the rub: people who live near family have certain expectations of Family Time that those of use who don't live near extended family members do not have. On an intellectual level, I understand the concept of guarding Family Time jealously; I don't see my extended family often, and I don't always want to dilute that time with other stuff. What I have a hard time with is people who see their extended family virtually every day needing to do the same. I mean, didn't you just see Mom on Wednesday? Didn't you spend last weekend together with your sisters and their families? Don't you have dinner together every Friday night?
I can't decide if I envy this closeness, or if I just totally don't get it. Because someone whose ENTIRE FAMILY lives in the same zip code, someone who is a SAHM with three kids aged 3 to 8, someone whose husband works a non-traditional schedule (he's home some mornings, which means he works those evenings)....how can someone like this need to focus more on Family Time? There is no one sick in her extended family (yes, I'd know about anything huge: they are church members). The one big project for them right now is that her husband is opening his own business (he's actually establishing himself as owner in a business he already is in) in a few weeks, and that is quite stressful and busy in a way I have never experienced, so I understand that.
But here's the thing: she spends every day with her family. All day. Her husband works maybe 55 hours a week, right now. She has sisters who can babysit when she needs to help him out, her mom watches the kids regularly. And she continually, for the past several months, has told everyone who will listen how completely stressed she and her husband are, that there are too many things going on in her life, that this business change for him is financially scary, that she can't be involved with projects to the extent that she has been in the past until he gets settled in. Fine.
But at the same time, she continues to work on projects, committing the groups she's in charge of to future events. Until--BOOM!--she throws the partially-constructed mess into our laps, whereupon we find that not only is this a ticking bomb, but there are piles of goo in every direction, debris from unfinished and critically important year-old DUTIES that have not been handled. At all. "Oh, by the way, someone needs to take care of...." And she washes her hands of the whole thing, leaving us with the potential of disappointing the ENTIRE church, not to mention several young teenagers. Her excuse: She needs more Family Time.
The result is that the people she dropped this on have essentially no family time for the ensuing week. Not only that, but all three of the adults work over 30 hours a week. We all have children of our own whose schedules are rather more set in stone than the average 3- or 4-year-old. None of us has family in the area on whom we can call for help. Ever. For anything, from babysitting to stuffing envelopes to to driving under-16s hither and yon. Between the three of us, there are several cases of serious long-term illness in the extended families that could present us with the need to drop everything--for real--so we can go help out our family members in a real crisis. The kind of crisis that could end in long-term hospitalization or death, not a serious sleep-shortage due to a child with a cold, or having to move office furniture on a weekend (her apparent definitions of "crisis").
This would all be annoying enough to deal with at church, but Beast and I drive by her house every day, regardless of where we go. So there is the constant dread of seeing her and a) having to decide how to face her without taking her apart verbally; or b) having her flag us down to "mention" something else that she (ahem) never got around to, but "someone needs to do."
I have told people that I will NOT clean this up. Beast feels that there is a real need to get things organized, so he's been busting his hump this week--and not getting things done around our house that he wants to do, to his consternation (not mine, I couldn't care less what he does in that respect!). He is beyond frustrated. I am livid, even after a week. Part of my fury is with myself for allowing her to dupe me again, having already had experience with her M.O. previously.
So I'm left with trying to figure out why people do this. I strongly believe that everyone has a different level at which their lives equilibrate. Some can manage 38 individual activities and look graceful doing it; others barely manage three or four, but they do them well, consistent and reliable at every turn. However, I really don't understand this situation at all. Beast has ascribed it to this individual's need for drama, and no doubt there is some truth there. But, if that's all there is, then it just makes me want to smack her more, and harder, and it doesn't help me in trying to figure out how to deal with her (and others like her) in the future.
I do feel accountable to the teenagers, however. I love those high school kids, and disappointing them, walking out on them, is just not feasible. They buoy me whenever I'm with them, even when I see them struggling for answers, even when I know they don't even know what the questions are. What I receive from them is purely intangible but huge; I pray we three leaders are able to give back at least as much as we receive!
Frankly, if you aren't in something like this with your whole heart, you shouldn't be in it at all. So in the end, it's probably better that this other person walked away. Kids this age are notoriously good at spotting a fake, a hypocrite. And what kind of model is that to present to them anyway?
My family--in case you haven't figured this out--is scattered. I am one of the fortunate few who lives within 50 miles of several adult family members: two nephews and a niece (and a nephew-in-law). My mom and oldest sister and brother-in-law live less than 10 miles from one another. Otherwise, we are all far enough away from each other to make "seeing family" a fairly Big Deal and an unusual occurrence.
Lots of people in the area where we live grew up here, have lived here the majority of their lives, and have family very close by. In our church, there are several families with three generations of members. One has four generations. I think that is kind of cool to be able to say about our church, but quite frankly it makes interpersonal stuff in our church a bit of a minefield. If you have a disagreement with one person, it can easily blow up into entrenched warfare. For the most part, it doesn't (that I'm aware of) because people do their best to stay out of each other's fights.
That's the background. Here's the rub: people who live near family have certain expectations of Family Time that those of use who don't live near extended family members do not have. On an intellectual level, I understand the concept of guarding Family Time jealously; I don't see my extended family often, and I don't always want to dilute that time with other stuff. What I have a hard time with is people who see their extended family virtually every day needing to do the same. I mean, didn't you just see Mom on Wednesday? Didn't you spend last weekend together with your sisters and their families? Don't you have dinner together every Friday night?
I can't decide if I envy this closeness, or if I just totally don't get it. Because someone whose ENTIRE FAMILY lives in the same zip code, someone who is a SAHM with three kids aged 3 to 8, someone whose husband works a non-traditional schedule (he's home some mornings, which means he works those evenings)....how can someone like this need to focus more on Family Time? There is no one sick in her extended family (yes, I'd know about anything huge: they are church members). The one big project for them right now is that her husband is opening his own business (he's actually establishing himself as owner in a business he already is in) in a few weeks, and that is quite stressful and busy in a way I have never experienced, so I understand that.
But here's the thing: she spends every day with her family. All day. Her husband works maybe 55 hours a week, right now. She has sisters who can babysit when she needs to help him out, her mom watches the kids regularly. And she continually, for the past several months, has told everyone who will listen how completely stressed she and her husband are, that there are too many things going on in her life, that this business change for him is financially scary, that she can't be involved with projects to the extent that she has been in the past until he gets settled in. Fine.
But at the same time, she continues to work on projects, committing the groups she's in charge of to future events. Until--BOOM!--she throws the partially-constructed mess into our laps, whereupon we find that not only is this a ticking bomb, but there are piles of goo in every direction, debris from unfinished and critically important year-old DUTIES that have not been handled. At all. "Oh, by the way, someone needs to take care of...." And she washes her hands of the whole thing, leaving us with the potential of disappointing the ENTIRE church, not to mention several young teenagers. Her excuse: She needs more Family Time.
The result is that the people she dropped this on have essentially no family time for the ensuing week. Not only that, but all three of the adults work over 30 hours a week. We all have children of our own whose schedules are rather more set in stone than the average 3- or 4-year-old. None of us has family in the area on whom we can call for help. Ever. For anything, from babysitting to stuffing envelopes to to driving under-16s hither and yon. Between the three of us, there are several cases of serious long-term illness in the extended families that could present us with the need to drop everything--for real--so we can go help out our family members in a real crisis. The kind of crisis that could end in long-term hospitalization or death, not a serious sleep-shortage due to a child with a cold, or having to move office furniture on a weekend (her apparent definitions of "crisis").
This would all be annoying enough to deal with at church, but Beast and I drive by her house every day, regardless of where we go. So there is the constant dread of seeing her and a) having to decide how to face her without taking her apart verbally; or b) having her flag us down to "mention" something else that she (ahem) never got around to, but "someone needs to do."
I have told people that I will NOT clean this up. Beast feels that there is a real need to get things organized, so he's been busting his hump this week--and not getting things done around our house that he wants to do, to his consternation (not mine, I couldn't care less what he does in that respect!). He is beyond frustrated. I am livid, even after a week. Part of my fury is with myself for allowing her to dupe me again, having already had experience with her M.O. previously.
So I'm left with trying to figure out why people do this. I strongly believe that everyone has a different level at which their lives equilibrate. Some can manage 38 individual activities and look graceful doing it; others barely manage three or four, but they do them well, consistent and reliable at every turn. However, I really don't understand this situation at all. Beast has ascribed it to this individual's need for drama, and no doubt there is some truth there. But, if that's all there is, then it just makes me want to smack her more, and harder, and it doesn't help me in trying to figure out how to deal with her (and others like her) in the future.
I do feel accountable to the teenagers, however. I love those high school kids, and disappointing them, walking out on them, is just not feasible. They buoy me whenever I'm with them, even when I see them struggling for answers, even when I know they don't even know what the questions are. What I receive from them is purely intangible but huge; I pray we three leaders are able to give back at least as much as we receive!
Frankly, if you aren't in something like this with your whole heart, you shouldn't be in it at all. So in the end, it's probably better that this other person walked away. Kids this age are notoriously good at spotting a fake, a hypocrite. And what kind of model is that to present to them anyway?
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