Friday, July 24, 2009

Consideration

I'm thinking of moving my blog, closing this one down or at least marking it as 'done'...something.

What brought this on? I received news today that V.--our most elderly staff member up until a few months ago when she retired (at 96) due to ill health--is doing something similar to what my mom did last month. She has stopped taking her meds, refuses more medical testing, and just wants to be done.

With this news, and the events surrounding my mom's death, along with ill-health of good friends and other family, changes in Beast's job, Sparky's Adventures in Adolescence and other assorted worries, I am in a bit of a tailspin. All I want to do is sleep, do crosswords, play games online, and watch TV. Reading is a challenge--first time for that--and writing is both mentally and physically difficult. It comes as a bit of a surprise to me that my brain can cramp with the weight of stress.

I think I've reached saturation. I need an extended break from...well, everything. And since I can't actually take a break of that sort in my day-to-day life, I've gotta let something go, and hold out for something new and fun around the corner when I no longer feel like I'm on the verge of falling into the abyss pell-mell. It's even possible that any new blog I start might be a little more transparent. Then again, it may not. We'll see.

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