From: Marie@[provider].net [mailto:Marie@[provider].net]
Sent: Thursday, September 14, 2006 7:11 PM
To: Del@aol.com; Jean and Reg@ntlworld.com; CC@aol.com; Elizabeth@[provider].net; Cat. and Beast@[provider].net; Katherine@[provider].net
Subject: Mom's condition
Today I visited Mom around noon and saw the new wheelchair I ordered on Tuesday. Medicare should pay for the rental for maybe 11 months and then if she still needs it they'll buy it. Paid some bills and left. Once I arrived home, I had a call from the [...] Home Health Care Nurse (a man) who apparently stops by once a week (although I never knew of his visits from Mom.) He found she is not holding any oxygen in her blood and saw some other things that made him think she has had another stroke (speech and malaise) since he saw her last week after her hospital visit. So he called the doctor and they have put her on oxygen 24/7. I don't know if that means canisters to carry or ?In addition, the nurse set up an appointment with one of the new drs. at the same practice as Dr. B. on Tuesday at 11:30 am, which incidentally fouls up our driving for MOW next week.
I ordered the wheelchair when it was apparent that she couldn't help me get her into the car to get her hair washed and set (the hairdresser will be gone for 3 weeks) We didn't go, and Andrea at [Assisted Living Center] thankfully washed her hair in the hairdresser's sink yesterday instead.
I called the doctor this past Tuesday for the wheelchair and also for them to get an appt. with an orthopedist quickly so he can check on the left knee and make certain the parts are holding together. Mom thinks it is broken! I want a picture taken. So I will push her in the wheelchair a block to the orthopedist on Monday at 3 pm and then on Tuesday same routine to this new appt. with a different doctor. I already had two appointments scheduled for her on Thursday to the urologist and Dr. B. (in the same building and I will push her in the wheelchair for those as well).
Depending on what they find, we may be moving her to a nursing care home next week and trying to move out her room at [Assisted Living Center] before we leave on Sept. 26. The nursing care facilities have wheelchair access vans that [Assisted Living Center] doesn't have. Before she can go into nursing home care, Medicare mandates a 3 day hospital stay so we hope we can move this along pretty quickly.
[...]
Let me know any questions you may have. I'll pass them on to the drs. we'll be seeing.
Stay healthy!
Love, Marie
My reply:
From: Cat. and Beast [mailto:Cat and Beast@[provider].net]
Sent: Friday, September 15, 2006 9:15 AM
To: Marie@[provider].net'; 'Del@aol.com'; 'Jean and Reg@ntlworld.com'; 'CC@aol.com'; 'Elizabeth@[provider].net'; 'Katherine@[provider].net'
Cc: '[Beast at work]'
Subject: RE: Mom's condition
Hi [Oldest Sis].From: Marie@[provider].net [mailto:Marie@[provider].net]
This sounds pretty serious. I'm just wondering if I should see about planning a trip to Colorado while you're gone next month? When will you be back home? I will look around for flights today and see what I can find. I'm including [Beast] in this reply, so he's up to speed.
Hope you aren't knocking yourself out with all this running around. As usual, I'm extremely grateful that you are there, willing and able to intercede on Mom's behalf. And thank goodness for people like the home health nurse who really seems to be doing his job!!
Take care and let me know what you think.
Love,
Cat.
Sent: Friday, September 15, 2006 11:07 AM
To: Cat. and Beast
Subject: Re: RE: Mom's condition
[Cat]:[There's a link in the sidebar for all the family names]
Del and I have talked over the past two weeks and he will be on the road the first week of October, I think. You might check with him as to what days he is not [at home]. He already says he is on call to come here if necessary. I think we'll know more next week when perhaps you can make reservations.
We leave here on Sept. 26 [for Tuscany].... We return on October 25.... We would then drive [home] on Oct. 27.
You know me! I feel I am ready, packed to go. Jan can take care of himself. But I did lie away last night thinking about where to store her stuff if we have to move it out quickly.... Our garage will have one less car in it so guess everything could go there. But I think we will have to hire a mover---we moved in piece by piece over a period of time and I'm not feeling I can physically handle it quickly (nor do I want Jan to be responsible). Her rent is paid through September 30 so if you or Del have to make the arrangements once we're gone, they might prorate by the day and give you some breathing room.
I have made it clear to Mom that our travel plans are non-negotiable. If she dies the day before we leave then perhaps I'd have to reconsider. We do have travel insurance for the entire trip as well but I can imagine the hassle to change the ticket! I am so torn between Jean's condition and Mom's and right now I think Jean and Reg need something to look forward to.
As I have discussed with Del, I am not rushing back to make arrangements if she should die while we're away. Any memorial service can wait until we can gather ... (since her ashes will be taken to the plot...). [...] Mortuary can take care of the details and do the cremation here if necessary, all done by phone, I would think. Important papers for her are under ....
Enough of this depressing news! We're having a regular monsoon here over the past 24 hours. Supposed to clear up tomorrow.
Love, Marie
So, again the lesson is never plan ahead, never assume the best, and never think a year can go by without a medical crisis. I need to call my sister and brother tonight and figure out whether I do need to come. Luckily, it's working out that the week Beast has to go on the road next month is the week my brother is home. I can get out there the first week in October if necessary. We'll have to see after that.
Whee.
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